The Benevolent Mistress

female dominationThere seems to be a school of thought in the world of femdom and forced feminisation that the mistress should be a tyrant. A raging aggressive harridan who makes their submissive tremble and inflicts terrible physical punishment on their weak bodies. A woman who thinks men weak and wants to trample over their rights and needs.

I suppose there’s a market for this type of thing but I can’t imagine that it’s sustainable in a long-term relationship.

For me being a benevolent mistress is the only way to live when you are in a real Female Led Relationship.Now, of course you need rules and Alice has to abide by them. She has to show a deep respect to me, be a well-behaved girl and do the housework. As long as she does these things then why would I be nasty to her? What about punishment you might ask? Yes there’s punishment. I spank her and I think that’s necessary to show where she sits in the relationship status. Submissive. If you admonish your children it’s for their benefit, you don’t love them any less. They just need discipline to ensure they behave correctly and to learn who’s in charge. And so it is with husbands. I would never harm Alice, just make her bum a little red. Sometimes more than a little but that all depends on her behaviour not my maliciousness.

Being kind to your partners works well on their behaviour too. I always allow Alice to watch her forced feminisationfootball team on the TV or even to go to the live games. This has always been a passion of hers even when she was male. Why would I deny her some pleasure? I have to say it’s rather amusing to see her getting excited at home when watching the games on TV as she jumps around in her little skirt. Doing these types of things avoids any resentment and the need for extra enforcement. In the end it’s easier on me. And we are married after all and she does do everything for me. As long as she remembers that my needs come first then I’ll always allow her these little treats.

I really believe that a benevolent mistress ultimately gets more from their submissive partner than someone who is nasty. If that type of relationship does indeed even exist. I’ve met a few people in relationships like ours now and I can say they all operate in a similar fashion to mine. The woman is in charge but rarely if ever has to resort to any really nasty stuff.

It’s a woman’s world here in my corner of North London, why would I not be happy?


About Lady Alexa

I am a writer and a believer in the immense benefits of male feminisation and female domination. My blog records my true-life experiences in these areas. I also have several novels and a non-fiction book published on Amazon about forced feminisation which you can find under my pen name Lady Alexa. I live in a quiet corner of North London with my obedient and feminised husband/housewife.
This entry was posted in Female led relationships, femdom, forced feminisaton, forced feminization, husband in a dress and tagged , , , , , , , , . Bookmark the permalink.

30 Responses to The Benevolent Mistress

  1. sexlinestories says:

    I agree with that. I get soooo many men wanting me to be harsh with them. They forget the softer control side, which I think is more appealing to me

    Liked by 1 person

  2. explorer3000 says:

    I love your thinking…..


  3. badger1080 says:

    I would say that you have made the exactly correct thoughts to achieve a long term relation. You are very wise to see these thoughts and understand those thoughts I’m not sure there is anyone who could achieve a full time cruelty . I must admit I wish I could have those thoughts fulfilled but there is also the avenue you have mentioned.


    • Lady Alexa says:

      I have attended a couple of Mistress training workshops in East London. They had slaves who wanted pain and I actually couldn’t do it. (The pain not the mistressy bit which was no problem). But in a long term relationship there has to be a caring side. As long as the submissive knows their place and the Mistress has the authority to keep him there then it works better.

      Liked by 2 people

  4. Philipp says:

    I would certainly prefer a loving benevolent Mistress to a nasty one. I would be much happier serving a benevolent Mistress.



  5. dafni says:

    Lady Alexa, I agree with you (as always) that loving authority is best for a long term relationship. There must be trust, respect, and love on both sides. I have visited many pro dommes in NYC (too many to count sadly) and many of the women are true sadists and love just beating the heck of out men – for a lot of reasons I’m sure. But that would never make for a good relationship unless the guy loves getting beaten, which I don’t. A strong spanking past tears for actual wrong doing (talking back, showing disrespect towards women, etc) is important to demonstrate your strength and power in the relationship but I believe more women can get men to do what they want through kindness and love than through screaming and beatings. I also think surrounding males with proper ‘girls’ to show them what a properly trained and obedient male should look like and act like is also helpful. Lady Alexa, because of you and your site I have gotten the courage to order myself my first dress which arrived today, it’s in my office file cabinet and i’m nervous but excited to put it on along with a pair of nice panties (which look like I ordered too small). Anyway, thank you so much for taking the time to maintain this site and to keep us updated. You are helping us wannabe submissive gurls understand that our obedience and feminization is natural, good, right, and a benefit to our growing female led society. Keep up the incredible work, please.

    Liked by 3 people

  6. dave94015 says:

    Reblogged this on dave94015 and commented:
    Is it necessary for a Mistress to be cruel to her partner? Can she also be benevolent?


  7. SissyStephie says:

    This is a great post ! So true. My Mistress K , is never mean, abusive physically to me. Not our thing. Humiliation with words during a session yes, public humiliation yes. But those things arouse us ! I don’t think I’d stayed , entered into this femdom/ feminization relationship if it was about pain. Now she can pound me pretty hard in several positions with her strap on and 7.5 inch all American whopper and it can be a little painful sometimes but mostly feels good, vibrates. , (used to be her toy that I strapped on used by on her) She’s moved up to a Real Feel no7 BBC vibrating cock nearly 9 inches x 3 that I strap over my little clitty as she says. Thing is our harness has 2 pockets in front with bullet vibes so my clit feels pretty awesome as she’s telling me how to do another thing, she always unlocks my clitty from chastity before a sexual service session. Knows how good my clit feels when I slide on my panties she’s picked out then gbelt and thigh highs, likes to laugh because my clit gets hard as soon as the panties hit it. Says such a good sissy. I’m shaved smoothe all the Don’t necessarily get to cum during the session but at least she unlocks me. That’s being nice, no pain, hurting . We’re just not into it but to each their own. I’m usually stretched pretty good by the time she takes me, I’ve always douched and been plugged with a large silicone pussy plug as she calls it. Sissy Stephie

    Liked by 1 person

    • Lady Alexa says:

      Exactly Stephanie and of course, benevolence means many things

      Liked by 1 person

      • SissyStephie says:

        Yes definitely, I wonder back how my Mistress K soon to be partner when we marry in July, I’ll be the wife. Anyway how she saw I’d take to femdom/feminization so well, and love it like I do. Oh well I know all women are my superiors , and treat all with respect, submission , attitude wise. I think more women would actually love a feminized, submissive man if they tried it. IMO anyway.


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